An enthusiastic father purchased a bicycle for his son on his 10 th birthday. The son was delighted to have a new bicycle, and the father was excited, to fit together the bicycle along with his son. After hours of unsuccessful attempts, the father noticed the instruction manual.An hour later, the father and son successfully assembled the bicycle.
This is a classic example of how we work with and on our own marriages. By ourselves, it’s a frustrating experience but with God’s guidance through His Manual – the Bible - it’s a piece of cake which one can have and eat it too!
The state of affairs within Christian families in our society and churches are a matter of deep concern. It is said that, these days marriages ‘fail’. The fault probably lies in the foundational understanding of marriage itself. If we accept that God is the author of our Marriages and the Word of God is the manual to put this marriage together, then we have no excuse. In reality, our marriages do not fail, we fail God. We fail to look into the manual and follow through on what we are called to do – for instance, forgiveness. We fail to trust God when the situation ‘appears’ hopeless. We consistently fail God and that possibility arises simply because God has given us a free will and expects us to exercise it as per our discretion. If that is true, marriages fail because we choose to fail.
The other plausible reason why families are in trouble, could be, that the majority of them are spending their time reacting to issues rather than proactively building a strong foundation for marriage.
We are living in a time period, when the very definition of marriage and what it means to be a family is being altered. Does your sociology control your theology or vice versa? Let us realign our theology.
The Media and Culture have their own definitions of family; and now there is a push to legalize the redefinition of marriage. If we as Christian parents, do not rise up to the occasion and help our children experience the right definition of marriage and family, the greatest tragedy today and in the future, will then be that our children will be raised to believe in the redefinition which is acceptable and the ‘new’ normal;.
Families, and the consequences attached to them, touch every area of the church, society and our nation. A weak leadership at home creeps into the church, society and nation. Strong families hold the key to a strong society and the converse is also true. This is so because every other institution in the society is predicated on and dependent upon strong families.
Strong families need God as their Cornerstone or the Centerpiece.
When a Father abandons his family or abdicates his responsibility, a son learns it as an option for himself in the future. A daughter will detest or fear a similar desertion by the man she marries. When a Mother gives precedence to seek employment over the tedious tending to her children and home, then children will ascertain ways to avoid difficult responsibilities when they become adults.
Only when we revisit God’s design and purpose for marriage, will we rejoice in God’s blessings through the institution of the family. When we return to God and align our marriages under Him, we will experience the peace, purpose, and provision He intended.
Marriage is the foundation of the family, and family is the foundation of the society. The story of a nation is the narrative of its families written at large.
The most foundational aspect to see from the Bible about Marriage is that it is God’s doing for His glory.
“It is a foolish man who expects his wife to be to him that which only Jesus Christ Himself can be: ready to forgive, totally understanding, unendingly patient, invariably tender, and loving, unfailing in every area, anticipating every need, and making more than adequate provision.
Such expectations put a wife under an impossible strain. The same goes for the wife who expects too much from her husband.” Ruth Bell Graham – (said it the other way around – “it is the foolish woman who …)
A Marriage is founded on the covenant relationship between God and the couple. It is a dual covenant wherein both covenants are NOT mutually exclusive.
The Principle of a covenant marriage is SACRIFICE – of our selfishness.
The Purpose of a covenant Marriage is ONENESS – of our hearts and minds to bring glory to God.
The Prophetic nature of a covenant marriage is to DISPLAY God – His unconditional Love and Forgiveness clearly seen operating in our lives.
Kendrick / Alcorn. The Resolution for Men. Ed. Lawrence Kembrough. Nashville: B&H Publishing Group, 2011. Book.
Piper, John. This Momentary Marriage. Secunderabad: Authentic Books, 2009. Book.